Reversing the Silver Bullet

Out of all of the horrible things that I went through, I think that one of the worst was when I was falsely accused of being an unfit parent. My ex-partner didn’t outright accuse me of abuse or neglect but strongly framed me as unstable and hard to live with.

Targeted parents are empathetic and good-hearted to a fault. We know real love, real affection, and secure attachments. Our love is patient and kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs (ok, well maybe just a few). Our love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails (1 Corinthians 13:4–8a). These are personality traits that the world desperately needs more of, but the only ones who seem to notice our propensity to hold to our positive moral convictions is narcissists.

Narcissistic/borderline parents project and blame the targeted parent for their abusive and neglectful behaviors. They accuse us of the very things that they are doing. They know that false accusations won’t cost them anything, will prolong litigation and they won’t be held responsible for perjury, liable or slander. An interesting side note is that narcissistic/borderline parents and the children they control use the words “abuse” and “force.” They do this because these dramatic words intimate the Judiciary from changing or enforcing placement.

False accusations of abuse or neglect should be as alarming to legal professionals and court authorities as the substantiated claims. A parent who makes false accusations of abuse against the other parent is clearly the one with the problem. They psychologically (emotionally) exploits their a child's vulnerable developing systems and also hurt him/her by continually attacking the attachment with the targeted parent.

In addition, these parents intentionally and repeatedly induce their children to publically and caustically betray their loving and devoted parent and corrupt their developing morality. These children learn that they can break any and all laws, deceive and manipulate authorities and feel justified in doing so.

False accusations of abuse or neglect are not just some little white lies that don’t hurt anyone. These accusations are so traumatic that they impair the targeted parent mentally and physically. They devalue the targeted parent’s sense of parenthood; destroy their integrity and ruin their careers and reputations. Even when these accusations are blatantly unfounded, the suspicions about the targeted parent’s parenting are planted in everyone’s mind.

“A parent's right to the preservation of his/(her)

relationship with his child derives from the fact

that the parent's achievement of a rich and rewarding

life is likely to depend significantly on his/(her)

ability to participate in the rearing of his children.

A child's corresponding right to protection from

interference in the relationship derives from

the psychic importance to him/(her)of being raised

by a loving, responsible, reliable adult.”

Franz v. U.S., 707 F 2d 582, 595^Q599; US Ct App (1983).

A false accusation of abuse by one parent against the other parent is a painfully obvious, intentional act to harm both the children and targeted parent. This insidious and coercive type of domestic violence leads to emotional devastation, homelessness, financial insecurity, the loss of family, and even sometimes the loss of freedom.

A false allegation of abuse is a far-reaching interpersonal crime that is indicative of narcissistic/borderline personality disordered parents. It is also; perjury, defamation of character, pure trauma and the Intentional Infliction of Emotional Distress (IIED). Narcissistic/borderline parents intentionally deceive the court and child protective service while wasting precious time and resources. More importantly false accusations of abuse are pathological manipulation and control of a child’s thoughts, feelings and behaviors.

In summary, false accusations of abuse are the toxic synergy of mental illness, child psychological abuse and severe domestic abuse (by proxy).

It's game time champ, and you're up!!

If you are or have been falsely accused of being unfit for any reason, you need to hit this one out of the park! Tell your lawyer to go to bat for you right away.

What kind of person has such a warped moral compass? What kind of a parent could intentionally inflict so much pain and suffering on his or her own family---and for what reason?